Friday, April 27, 2007


Bullies Do Hurt- they needs must be stopped immediately.

As I was growing up, I always have wondered, why have people treated each other so badly. why can't they be nice to each other. But, you know what? I was left out of things by kids in school, because of just that. I was shy, and solitary. I was 'TOO Nice'. Now, how can a person be too nice?! That is just Absurd.
That really made me irritated. Why, I wondered do people think they can do and say such stupid, untrue things to me? I decided, finally it was them, not me. My perception of People is that, in general can be so thoughtless. My Mom and Dad were always there to talk to me about it. My Mom, being half Irish, knew what it was like to be discriminated against. My Dad seemed to know something about it too. But, he just preferred not to go there. I decided I needed to find some kind of answer to that question. Actually, there is no real answer of course, but many factors are involved. Kids copy their adults. So, unacceptable behavior continues to be permitted.
When I was in elementary school, the teacher's oldest daughter Betty, decided to amuse herself by saying mean things to me and making me cry. She got a real charge out of it. And she believed that because she was the teacher's daughter, she was untouchable.
And my brother just told me not to be a baby. None of the other kids even tried to help me either. I didn't say anything at first, to my Mom and Dad because I was too confused.
My older brother said not to tell Mom because 'Betty' could get into trouble!? (you say what?!) You see, Mom was on the school board. And Mom would not let me be mistreated that way.
This went on for at least a week. It seemed longer. And little miss bitch was having a great time. She was really feeling powerful.
Finally it was that weekend, when I told Mom and Dad about it. My brother called me a crybaby tattle tale little twit. But, my parents grilled him about it and scolded him about not sticking up for me. So, to him, I WAS TWICE IN THE WRONG, because now, not only was Betty caught, but now He was in trouble too, and it was all my fault. Mom and Dad were upset and disgusted about it. . Because there were quite a few factors involved.
Until Mom and Dad could get to the bottom of it. They told me some ways to fight back. Verbally that is. One real cannonade they gave me was: 'is the only way you can feel good about yourself, is to make someone else feel bad? I did get a chance to use that too, And Betty was very taken by surprise.
The families were neighbors we saw everyday. We all lived in the same small valley. And most of the other kids were cousins. However, Betty and her mother the teacher are NOT related. Neither were the Schneider's. So for a few days, Mom and Dad talked to my aunts. And also the Schneider kids. Mom drove up to see Phoebe, who was Betty's Mother and our school teacher, to talk with her.
After speaking to Phoebe and interviewing other kids. Phoebe (much to her embarrassment) and Mom found I was right about Betty. The other thing too, people found out, that you don't mess with my Mom's kids. Because you see, Mom wasn't really accepted up there, because she wasn't born there. My Dad was. To them she was an unknown quantity. Well, now they knew, Mom had teeth. Mom had always kept a very low profile. So, she seemed fair game to them to disrespect.. Kids copy by example..
Betty did still try to torment me . I nailed her verbally a few times, with things that my parents had armed me with. Boy, she was ticked because I had exposed her for the bully she was and she no longer had any 'power' over me. Phoebe noticed too, so, finally, Betty was shipped off to another town to live with relatives, until she graduated to high school. Because, you see, a bully will keep at lt. and they must be stopped. right at the beginning. This 'kids will be kids' is a lot of crap. Children are born barbarians that need to be civilized. Kids will do anything, if they think they can get away with it. No one should be demeaned, be-littled, denigrated or taunted and feel diminished. It is just plain mean and less than acceptable behavior. No it does not make someone 'tougher'. It makes them that much more fragile. Of course I had great parents who were always interested in my welfare. Why aren't more parents like that?
No one tried to tease me again. At least not that way. I just became much more defensive. But, in a 'passive aggressive way.' I chose not to let 'others' define who I am. You can't help what people say, or what they think. You have to not let it concern you. I do have another tale to relate later.
That set me on to reading about people, I found books and articles in magazines that covered those subjects. I determined to educate myself and find out how to handle people who were that sort. I READ.
Oh, yes, wait until I write about when I started High school. I made a change there.
However, I lived my own life in my own way. Because, the very ones who tried to disenfranchise me, have done nothing in their lives. They are still there. Never been anywhere. Oh, they got married and had kids who have grown up, married and had kids--etc. Time itself was on my side.

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